A Day Filled with Love
Every morning with him is beautiful, but Saturday’s are my favorite - sweet kisses as soon as I wake, a perfectly buttered bagel and protein coffee brought to me in bed, and a joint getting smoked. The love that hadn’t been consumed physically for 3 days boiled inside both of us and came out as uncontrollable laughter while I laid flat on his chest with our bare body’s caressing each other. We had the most sensual time while laughing and touching, knowing we couldn’t cross the line or we’d be late to our plans. With one last tongue-tie and embrace, I left my warmth behind. It was the most beautiful morning and nothing besides our Saturday ritual was planned.
I got dressed in my favorite go-to outfit. My shirt the deepest of blues paired with my light blue skirt, slip on white Tommy Hilfigers, and my hair pulled back into a messy bun with a flawlessly executed everyday no makeup-makeup look. The drive to see our brother’s newborn was a breeze with love stuck to every inch of my skin, that nothing could disrupt my synchronicity with the universe to have an amazing day.
As we arrived with the best friend, my love was handed the baby before he even had the chance to say hi. I made my way around giving and receiving the warmest of hugs accompanied with smiles and chatter. I couldn’t keep my eyes off my man though; there was an uncertainty, but wonder in his eyes and I would be lying if I said I didn’t want to stay frozen in that moment for some time.
Did the baby fever kick in? Of course! Seeing my baby hold an actual baby was something from a movie. My whole world stood still every time either of us had the nugget in our arms and I could see our daughter and son so clearly like they were already a part of our lives. My heart filled with intense joy that felt a bit different than other times I was this elated. I imagined our little family before, but that moment gave me vision clearer than the contacts in my eyes confirming even more, that there would never be another.
While the nugget slept, we drank, sang, played games, and had a BBQ.
We said our goodbyes and I was suddenly in the back seat with a perfect buzz making sure I captured every moment inside my head to look back on when my anxiety and depression gave my angel-devil wing tattoo actuality.
My two best friends in the front seat beaming with pride and happiness, smiling from ear to ear looking like they were going to a Scholastic Book Fair in elementary school.
It was a perfect day.
I had an orange sherbet sunset in front of my glossy, cross faded eyes and I couldn’t help but to think about how grateful I am. As much as I want more things, I can finally admit that it truly is a want and not a need. I have everything.
A man who is my boyfriend.
A boyfriend who is my best friend.
A friend who I know would do anything to keep respect on my name.
5 physical places I get to call home.
1 person who will always be home.
Self respect and love for myself.
There is so much I can complain about, but there are so many more blessings that I get the opportunity to have as mine. As I sat there, on the softest blanket that reminds me of love and safety, in the front yard of my friend’s house, I couldn't do anything but exude pure euphoria.
As the pink and orange sky set that night, I felt my soul accepting the genuine love, safety, and serenity that my handsome planted and watered from the second our hands touched.
I am forever grateful for the life I’ve built with him. We will always be my favorite love story.
